Episode 137 – What Not To Write And Tips!

By Damien Newbie Writers Podcast Comments Off on Episode 137 – What Not To Write And Tips!

The Newbie Writers’ Podcast

Special Guest: Courtney Killian

Courtney KillianAbout Me (From Courtney’s Website)

I am a 19-year-old college student planning on getting a degree in elementary education. I’m starting this blog to get my dead pieces out and send out writing tips. I may also blog the first draft of my first full-length novel. I am currently unpublished, but I have a dream of becoming published. With a lot of work, I’ll become a small town girl that achieves a crazy big dream.

Courtney is a regular contributor to our show having revitalised our ‘Bring Out Your Dead’ segment. She also sends in responses to our prompts that are posted each week. Below is the most recent one from a few shows ago. Make sure you check out Courtney’s website: http://whatnottowriteandwritingtips.wordpress.com/


Prompt Response

The day before was just like any other day. I was wasting time on social media instead of writing like I should be. I saw a mysterious post on my Facebook from my sister about getting bad news from the doctor. I haven’t talked to my sister in months, and she hadn’t contacted my parents about anything recently, so it didn’t register in my mind to worry about it. My dad managed to contact her this morning. She told us the bad news. My sister was diagnosed with cancer in her uterus which caused a miscarriage.

If only I had known she was pregnant to begin with, I would have been happy for her and her husband. If only I had known she was pregnant, I might be able to stand by her side now. If only I had known that she was at risk for cancer, I could have known more about it and know what to say to her now. If only I had an actual relationship with her, I could encourage her as she gets ready for the surgery.

There are so many things I want to say to my sister, but don’t know if I can. All the “If only I had known” now won’t change the past, but maybe it can change the future. This wake-up call shows that life is too short to not have a relationship with your siblings. You never know what shit life is going to throw at you or someone you care about. I don’t know what stage the cancer is in, and I don’t know if my sister can be cured or not. I vow to build a relationship with my sister and listen to her when she talks. I want to never have to say, “If only I had known” again.



Family, family, what are you going to do?

Family, family, never listening to you.

Family, family, what are you going to do?

Family, family, no one knows what it’s like to be you.

I know the one who has been abused.

I know how it feels to be of no use.

I know the one who claims to have found the one.

I know how it feels to hear the couple say, “We’re done.”

Family, family, what are you going to do?

Family, family, never listening to you.

Family, family, what are you going to do?

Family, family, no one knows what it’s like to be you.

I know the one who has the disease.

I know how it feels to not want to leave.

I know the one who expects a baby.

I know how it feels to say, “Well maybe.”

Family, family, what are you going to do?

Family, family, never listening to you.

Family, family, what are you going to do?

Family, family, we’re always watching out for you.

Bring Out Your Dead

Nicky had everything going for her. She had a great home, great owner, and so many friends at her house. However, something was wrong. Her owner just wasn’t acting the same way. On one fateful day, she found out why, and found herself in the Neopian pound.

“I just don’t understand. How could my owner just abandon me like this?” Nicky complained, over and over again. “I mean, really. Everything was going great, and all of a sudden, this? I’m just a Blue Mynci, so nobody is going to pay attention to me. I hate it here. They don’t feed me anything. The only way I would get out of here is if someone wanted to somehow zap me…”

These thoughts continued to turn over in her head. About a week later, a pet owner came in. Now, from the very beginning, Nicky could tell there was something odd about the owner. She didn’t seem to be like the others that Nicky had listened to. Her name seemed to be Courtney, and she had gotten…a Green Quiggle before? Was that right? No, surely not. Nobody liked the plain pets… But Nicky couldn’t help but get a little excited. Could this be her ticket out of here? She looked at all the other animals, and saw that they were not excited. But she just had to be. This had to be what she had been waiting for…

“…And so, that is my reasoning for wanting a plain pet this time,” said the voice. Nicky looked up, and saw a young-looking girl enter into the room with Dr. Sloth.

“So you’re saying you’re wanting one for the lab ray that you may or may not get?” Sloth inquired.

“Yes, that is correct.”

“And so what happens if you decide against purchasing the ray?”

Courtney sighed. “How many times do I have to go over this? I will love and care for them as much as I do my other pets back at home. I don’t believe in pounding them, I believe in saving them.”

Nicky could hardly believe what she heard. An owner that actually doesn’t believe in pounding pets? She was trying to process this when suddenly…

“Dr. Sloth, this Mynci is adorable and perfect!” squealed Courtney.

“Ah, I see you found Nicky. She’s been in here about a week. She hasn’t been doing much, so I suppose you could take her.”

“And I want to. How much?” Courtney inquired.

Nicky was so happy. She was going home! She was paid for, and out of the pound with her new owner.

“So is it true that you really don’t believe in pounding pets?” Nicky asked.

Courtney looked at Nicky and smiled warmly. “Of course. I hate going in to the pound and seeing all of those poor pets… Oh, let’s go in here and get you something to eat.”

While they were eating, Nicky asked about the kind of pets she was going to be living with.

“Oh, they will just love you!” Courtney said. “You will be living with Intodracola, a Cloud Koi who was given to me by a friend who moved away, “Bea, a Macratite Usul whom I created, and Sue, a Baby Wocky, whom I created and was my first pet. She was originally Blue, but then Boochi got of her, and she’s been Baby ever since.”

The two finished eating and started walking ome. As expected, all the pets loved Nicky, and made her feel right at home. Courtney actually got her lab ray, and started zappy Nicky. Since then, she has been Baby, Red, Spotted, a Red Yurble, Ghost, and Snow. She was also turned to a he, thanks to the ray. Every single time he changed, the other pets always loved him, just as he was, and helped customize him accordingly.

If Nicky was sure of one thing, it was this: Although he liked being a Snow Yurble, he would be glad with whatever he was, and he loved his happy new home.


What if all communications systems collapsed simultaneously? Who would you call first? Oh right, you can’t call them.

Word of the Week:

From Schottenfreude

German words for the Human Condition

Ben Schott


Lood – vigs – zoon – drohm

Discover an indecipherable note in your own handwriting.

Tortured Sentences:

With this collection of data that it being collected Goggle states that it makes it easier.

Coming up:


No idea but stay tuned! Do you have a suggestion for a guest? A book to flog or a website? Then email us: podcast@newbiewriters.com


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